Baby Eleanor

You are going to be jealous....but this is who I have been snuggling with for 4 days.

My sweet niece, Eleanor, came for a visit.  Just 6 weeks old and couldn't be more precious!

cold!

Baby its cold outside.....not that you've noticed!

Check out all the beautiful "cold" moments in photos at the link below!

live every moment

Christmas morning- found!

I 

Joy to the world!!!!  It is a Festivus miracle!   (fyi, Festivus is a Seinfeld reference)  tee hee

I found the Christmas morning photos!  I don't even know how. It was totally random! All of a sudden I saw the file when I was uploading to Snapfish.  Somehow Snapfish was able to read the "unreadable files" that I didn't even know made it onto my computer!  I loaded everything to snapfish and then copied the photos off to my computer!  (I am loyal Snapfish customer forever now!)

I was terribly upset about losing these photos.  It was after all our first Christmas as a family with Tessa home....and Tessa's first Christmas.  Plus, I am a photo-freak and hate to lose any photos at all much less sentimental ones.  I even lost sleep over this and just felt sad.

Funny thing....I feel like I had just made peace with losing the photos.  I vented about it, blogged about it and then I put it into perspective.  There are far worse things and that they are just photos after all.  But I am sooooo happy to have them.  And will cherish them more than ever!

 Our first Christmas morning has a family is saved!  yeh!
Here are a few of my favorites.

The DS was on the top of Drew's list!  He was thrilled! Especially since I told him he had to be 21 to get one!

Andy and the ipad.   The best thing!

Jack's much need indoor trampoline!

Tessa meets and DANCE, DANCE, DANCES with Brobee!

She wore him out....literally!

Judson....loves his "got crickets" t-shirt!

Happy, happy, joy, joy!

We have our photos of our first Christmas morning as a family!

ahhh.....

Valentines photo challenge: PaperMama

This little guy captured my heart 4 years ago and I have never been the same.....

be my valentine.

And check out the beautiful Valentine entries at the Paper Mama!

i heart faces- smile

i heart faces: smile

As I was thinking of all the many smiles I could share, this photo from Ethiopia came to mind.  

I was riding on the bus with our travel group coming back from our journey to Hosanna, Ethiopia.  It was the most emotional day of my life. (post from this day is at This is big love).  I was filled with gratitude and a heavy heart.  Our bus slowed down and these beautiful girls walking on the side of the road caught my eye.  They saw me too.  The girl in green began saying hello me, waving and smiling.  Then, who I assume is her sister, started to pull her away as if she felt embarrassed by her sister's behavior.  It was a cute interaction and made me smile.  And just look at those beautiful girls...smiles and all in what feels like a world away, but isn't.

These girls remind me that we have so much to be grateful for, so much to smile about.

resolution

Yesterday is history.  Tomorrow is a mystery.  And today?  Today is a gift.  That's why we call it the present.  ~Babatunde Olatunji


I resolve to be ever present in the present.  More present as a Mom, a wife, a friend, a sister, a daughter.  This is about relationships....my most important blessing.  They are my priceless gifts.  I want more than anything to be able to fully soak up all of this life in the present moment.

I love this photo.  Love it, adore it.  I love it in its imperfection: a mirror shot, low light and taken on the timer.  The focus is off.  But this is me, staying in the present, even when it isn't perfect....and showing that.  Being present in the present doesn't consist of me being behind the camera.  In this moment it meant setting my camera down, pointing, hitting the timer and waiting.

But if you look and can feel it....Tessa is totally secure, loved.  

And I am totally present.

One of the ways in which I am committing to be present is by 

being apart of the Rockin' Mama Challenge.  Rock alone for 15 minutes a day with your child.  I have been rocking with Tessa for long periods since she came home.  My instincts told me we needed that alone time to connect, so I could teach her that I can soothe her.  Our rocking chair in her room is right next to her mirrored closet door.  I have loved that when she didn't want to make eye contact, she could look at us together.  We can make eye contact through the mirror as we rock.  

So, why participate in the challenge when I have already been doing this?  Because since I feel like we are becoming more and more bonded, I feel less of a need to carve this time out.  I don't want to lose the momentum we have in our bonding process.  I love it and this commits me to continue rocking, to stay present in it when I am tempted to be distracted by life's demands.  Staying present!

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express lane= stranger safety

Beware of the express lane at Walmart.  It meant a wake up call for me and a good talk about stranger safety....here goes-

I had ventured to Walmart with all three boys last weekend.  Not sure why I would do such a thing when Andy was home....sometimes I do need my head checked.  But they had been cooped up on a cold day. So, a Walmart outing seemed harmless.

We had a cart FULL.  As always happens.  That is when the manager eagerly encouraged me to just go ahead and use the empty "Express Lane".  Even though I clearly had a cart full....over the 15 item limit.  The clerk was fine with it to.  So, of course I was on a mission to get the heck out of Walmart asap.

As I unloaded the cart JackJack ran across the way to the evil arcade area.  I could see him, he didn't have coins but was happily pretending he was playing games.  So I continued to unload.  Right about then 2 more customers show up at Express check out with there handful of items.  Yep, I was the jerk in express check-out!  They didn't get to see the manager eagerly encourage me into the express lane.  There was some eye-rolling and huffing at me.  So, I pick up the unloading pace.  Jud and Drew needed to spend their coins on their little items and so I sent them to the back of the line, in an attempt to be courteous.

Just then as I am being handed the receipt I hear over the loud speaker "Will Jack's Mom please come to customer service".   That's me!   I look over at the arcade....no Jack.  People are looking at the crazy lady running to customer service.

There is my sad, scared little guy.  "Mama, I got scared.  I didn't know where you were".  Oh, Jack, honey!   While I am on the floor giving him big hugs, I am also explaining myself to customer service.  I could see him in the arcade, but obviously I was distracted with the express lane checkout when he walked out and didn't see me.  A couple saw he was scared.  He didn't want to talk to a "don't know", they said he was afraid to talk to them or go with them, but did agree to go find someone who worked at Walmart to find Mom.

("The Safe Side" is our favorite video about stranger safety, that is where the "don't know" speak comes from.  www.thesafeside.com   I really can't say enough about this video...my kids actually like watching it and it is a FANTASTIC way to talk about stranger safety....check it out at the library or just order it and watch it a 100 times like us.  created by John Walsh and the creator of baby Einstein, Julie Clark   Click this link:    The Safe Side)



Of course, my mind went to all sorts of places.  What if it hadn't been a nice, harmless couple helping Jack? What if there had been a predator there when Jack was so vulnerable without me?   Would he have been strong enough to refuse to leave the building with someone?  I can't know for sure, but it certainly brings up the need to have more conversations and reinforce what he did to stay safe.
 I felt like the- worst. mama. ever.   Not earning any Parent of the Year award here!

So, I take Jack back with me to get the unsupervised big boys at the express lane.  Jud had checked out with his small toy and said a guy behind him had to give him a quarter to be able to pay because he didn't have enough money!  geez.....    All the while Drew is standing there with a bag of coins.  Then of course, I see Drew is trying to check out with several items and his bag of coins.  The clerk hands him a pack of gum and says "you do have enough for this".  I didn't look behind us in the line, but I am pretty sure there was more huffing and eye-rolling.

(this is Jack, Jack with his usually cheerful, silly face)

Good grief.           Moral....even when invited, be leery of the express lane at Walmart, its just trouble for an overwhelmed Mama and will lead to losing children without knowing it, eye-rolling, huffing and puffing.

And....get the Safe Side video.  Talk to your kids about "Don't Knows" and who their safe people are.   You just never know.  Wake up call complete.